the valley of the shadow of death....

growing up my mom would tell us horror stories about all the times she had walked through the valley of the shadow of death. they were terrifying, eye rolling, guilt tripping tales that would pop up spratically through out the week. basically it was her dramatic way of relenting the pain staking sacrifice she dubiously went through day in and day out to bare, raise and live with us five ungrateful, loud, obnoxious children.
   when I married james she started filling him in on the woes of the valley of the shadow of death too. He had never heard of it, I guess his mother wasn't as sacrificial or as dramatic as mine. but he quickly caught on and six years later his favorite pastime is to help my mom plug the valley of the shadow of death.  if my mom is trying to get my brothers to hearken to her counsel or finish a job, james will sarcastically pipe in that my mom has experienced to much in the "shadows of death" and they shouldn't ignore her.   but my mother also excels in forewarning, and she did caution james that with george on the way we would soon be traveling to the deathly valley...

my first moments in the valley of the shadow of death

   And she was right, after 26 years of hearing all about the valley of the shadow of death, I finally got to visit for the first time on November 9th 2010.  Upon meeting her new grandson, my mom turned to james and said "do you now believe me about the valley of the shadow of death".  And I can honestly say it was unpleasant, indescribable and unique. I always wondered why when my mom spoke of her walks through the valley of the shadow of death she never gave a description, only a title, but now that I've been to valley I know why, its shadows are continually shifting and you never enter through the same door.  but you can always count on looking and feeling your worst when you visit.
   in the last three months I've become a frequent flier to the valley of the shadow of death, each visit shocks me less and thankfully has been less painful.  I'm becoming more familiar with its surroundings but still haven't mastered its domain.  I'm still figuring out how to rise, get ready and accomplish life for the day.  George doesn't think naps are useful which throws a wrench into our schedule... a lot.  Especially if I try to give him these useless naps in the car.  I'd been trying to get to the store for a few weeks to pick up some valentine creations so we could celebrate the upcoming holiday with festive decor, candy, and love.  all my daily attempts had failed, and when I  waited for james to come home so I could go I'd either have thrown in the towel by then or a more fun activity would appear.
   Yesterday wasn't any better George allowed me to shower but getting ready was not an option. as we gathered our things to pick my brother up from school I pulled my dripping wet, tassel towel dried hair into an unruly ponytail, hurriedly put on some ugly brown sweats that look like a mafia jumpsuit, and threw on a festive red shirt with matching valentine socks. half way to the school it hit me, we'd be passing the store on our way home so we could stop in!!! then I remembered i was dressed like cupid as a hit man and deserted my plan.  but the stress of valentines looming closer made me teeter back to back and forth and so I decided regardless of my sloppy attire, and my detestation of unruly people who can't look their best when they go out in public, I would put my vanity aside for the love of red,white and pink and finish my valentines day goal.

a vision of loveliness. (my apologies to aunt jen)

   it was a disaster! george screamed the entire time while balancing his binki in his mouth, my brother not only noticed my awesome valentine socks but made more then one reference of how cool they looked with my brown sweat pants, the wind did not help dry my wet hair, but instead plastered it thickly to my face, and worst of all the store did not have one festive Valentine item I had been searching for.  I bought some chocolate with the hope it would make everything better.  it helped a little, my mafia sweats were already to tight.  As soon as I got home, George zipped his lip and put on his cute happy face, and I realized then I had just returned from the valley of the shadow of death.